Doing the Challenge for Anyone
Pick a member of your personal, professional, or geographic community (your boss, romantic partner, child, neighbor, in-laws) as your target for kindness in the hopes of improving your relationship. This should be someone with whom you interact fairly regularly (whether in person or via phone or e-mail).
Note: Since every relationship is different, adapt the Challenge and the daily tips as necessary for the closeness of the relationship and how often you see each other. But in general, for thirty days:
1. Say nothing negative about your person, either to them or about them to somebody else. (If negative feedback is unavoidable – such as when you must correct the mistake of a child or colleague – be constructive, helpful, and encouraging and speak without a negative tone. For example, “Yes, the boss was in a bad mood today. The executive committee is probably on his case. Let’s stay focused and deliver a great report.”
2. Every day (or as often as possible), find one thing positive that you can sincerely praise or affirm about your person and tell them, and tell someone else. (Tell your mother-in-law, “Thanks for being willing to watch the kids last night while we were at that meeting,” then tell your husband that same thing — without bringing up that she let the kids stay up way too late again.)
3. Every day (or as often as possible), do one small act of kindness or generosity for your person.
— Shaunti Feldhahn
Day 1 – Communicate Kudos
Find something your person has done recently that is praiseworthy and compliment them on it.
“You did a great job at that sales presentation last week.”
“Way to go to baseball practice even though you didn’t feel like it.”
“Mom, I hear you got a big award – congrats!”
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